Gordon Freeman vs Issac Clarke is the second installment of Epic Rap Battles of Video Games and the second episode of Season One. It features protagonist of the Half-Life series, Gordon Freeman, against the Dead Space series' protagonist, Issac Clarke. It was released March 9th, 2013.
Well, well, it ain't my fellow engineer
Fighting alien bastards until they all disappear.
It seems we have a lot in common, using basic tools
but a crowbar? Your weapon of choice is for fools.
That G-man called you the right man in the wrong time
Well it's time for you to pay for your crime.
You and Black Mesa started the resonance Cascade
Starting the Combines' Earth conquering Crusade.
Looks like those Necromorphs fucked you up real bad
Dad-disappearing, Mom-praising Altman past? ain't that sad
It took me just 6 days to fuck up the whole Xen
But your Unitology friends just doesn't leave you alone, Amen
You make fun of my crowbar, while you are using a plasma cutter
I have a Gravity Gun, yours are no better than shit from a gutter
I will be your doom, so enjoy your last living seconds
Dead Space, filled with your scream, as death beckons.
Gordon's crowbar and Isaac's Plasma Cutter meet as they run into each other.
You are simply fighting aliens gobbling up the Earth
The convergence of necromorphs leads to the Moon's Birth.
Hive Mind was just the beginning, the Universe is at stake
As the Marker reaches its goal, the Brother Moons are awake.
My rapping, fighting, fixing skills are just so boss
So why don't you go and play portal with that GLaDOS?
Oh, and Ask Valve and Gaben why you aren't a trilogy
'Cuz waiting for it increased your fan's irritabilty.
You call that a rap? Well that was just plain crap
I rather go to Ravenholm that's full of head crab.
I'll crush you so fast it will be like a Seven Hour War
like your death scene, blood everywhre, so gore.
Maybe you should have turned it off, following Dementia
In the end you were just following the Marker's agenda
So give up now before you decay into bits of thousands
Since that's your half-life, mere nanoseconds.
fighting all kind of necromorphs that seems like a witchcraft
At least you didn't face Zerg-seemed creature from Starcraft!
With my HEV suit, those corpses would have been nothin'.
I wanna see you escaping Nova Prospekt if you're that cunnin'!
Fighting Cyborgs and big larva calling themselves Shu'ulathoi
You have no clue how freaky and crazy aliens can get, boy.
At least Alyx is still with me, sharing a booze
Nicole, Santos, and Eli- How many more are you going to lose?
I've gone through hardcore shit, like a needle in my eye
most hardcore you've gone is eatin' pills and gettin' high.
I am a theoretical physicist, we are on a different scale
I can recite the Quantum chromodynamic lagrangian to every detail!
You indeed share the same last name as Morgan Freeman
But compared to him you are no more than a fuckin' tin can
Oh Shut up, I'll show you how it's done in New Mexico
Blasting you from Ishimura all the way to Jericho
Isaac and Gordon look at each other angrily, and are about to attack, but suddenly a spaceship flies over them and drops... MASTER CHIEF!
Stop, Both of you, this rap battle is just pathetic
Thinking y'all were the master engineer, very empathetic
I'm here to finish this, in a way it is very relentless
My will for victory is somewhat similar to my skill, its endless
Combine? Necromorphs? They don't compare to covenants
But I'd beat all three of 'em without any discriminant
It's time to end this meaningless battle, be ready to be plustered
So now rest in pieces, you dirty-ass bastards.
- Although Jason thinks this battle is ass, he still likes the beat.